I have heard Bonsai descibed in many ways - art, horticulture, minitrisation, illusion, even torture.

Bonsai trees that are well kept are extremely vibrant and healthy, and in many cases will long out live their 'natural' family - many bonsai can be traced through many generations and can be 100's of years old.

Personally for me bonsai is not only a passion, but its also a metaphor: My personal experience with my health (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) has many parrells with bonsai, I hope to explore these in this Blog.


Tuesday, October 11, 2011

For Dr J and the late Steve Jobs

For Dr J and the late Steve Jobs

After a conversation with a friend Dr J, I was reminded about some of the topics that I said I would write about- you can read them here

Its timely to be writing this after the passing of Apple CEO Steve Jobs, but I have found an unusual advantage to owning a smart phone – my iPhone Revelation...

Mental Fatigue is something I have been battling with for some time, but can see some of the results in the efforts I have put into curbing these problems.As part of the fatigue clinic trial I intensively saw a psychologist, and after the programme ended i continued to see a different psychologist to continue training myself to deal with the mental side of the Chronic Fatigue.

Many things have changed since to onset of my illness, some examples of mental changes/fatigue were (are still) concentration issues, reading difficulties, holding conversation with people, problem solving, critical and creative thinking, troubles with memory ect.

It was as though my brain had forgotten/lost these skills and abilities, some entirely, some to a less degree. This caused much concern and anxiety to me and close friends and family, and really made me think hard about where i found my value as a person – because it was no longer to be found in my abilities.

During my time at the fatigue Clinic my life became very regimented, every 30 min block, every day was structured and evaluated (i might post some pages from my calendar/diary) This was to ensure that i didn’t overdo it physically and to also plan how i could extend myself in a measured way to try to build up my abilities. Mental tiredness was addressed in this plan, I planned, everyday what i would do and for how long i would do it for. Some examples, reading, crosswords, iPhone games and puzzles, yes iPhone Apps, reading people’s blogs to keep in touch etc

This was for me such a revelation; I spent time every day (programmed in), in increasing time testing and training my mind to do the things that i could do easily pre illness. I started with 5minute time lots, in time stretching it to 30min time lots. The fact that these could be done at home, but also anywhere at any time, without setup, and with relative ease was fantastic and helped me to stick at it. Most of the Apps were free too.

I did and still do – everyday
Sudoku
Crosswords
Scrabble
Word games
Puzzle games
Board games
Strategy Play
Memory games

For me the separating and different ways to try to address the different types of fatigue (Mental/Physical) were very helpful, and i do absolutely believe as do those close to me that my mental abilities are still not to the level they were pre illness – but that they have and are still improving, and for this i am thankful to Apple and the technology that has made my iPhone medicine available.

SB

The Differnt Faces of Fatigue

It was not until my time at the Fatigue Clinic UNSW That I finally understood the different types of fatigue that i needed to address – each with a different approach, reason and differing strategies to help alleviate them.

I’m going to talk briefly about 2 of them
- Mental Fatigue
- Physical Fatigue


I cannot express my gratefulness to the staff at the Fatigue Clinic particularly Dr C who worked with me in regards to physical fatigue, and Dr S who worked with me in regards to the mental side of fatigue and helped with coping strategies.

Mental Fatigue I will address in the next post

Physical Fatigue is really hard to define, it is different to being run down or tired, but similar. One of the most common responses I have gotten from people as we have talked about my chronic fatigue condition is – “why don’t you just get some more rest” or “everyone gets tired why can’t you just push through it”

To explain – I can sleep but the sleep is not refreshing or restful. When I wake up in the morning i feel unrefreshed and more tired than when i went to bed. I do not feel refreshed, energised or rested after sleeping. This is not just every now and then but every night – and it seems to have a cumulative and compounding effect as in – being Tired, sleep, wake tired, got to bed tired, wake up more tired, and so the cycle continues (and has been continuing for some years now)

Other physical things are muscle soreness, aches, endurance and strength.

Later i will talk specifically about
Pacing
Programming
The fatigue cycle


SB

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Back in Aus & A Bonsai Show

Feels great to be home after our time away, and we have got back into the well trod routine of our normals days and weeks.

Our time away was so very beneficial for our family, lots of time together and some really big issues discussed and decisions made (more in later posts)
Our time away was overwhelmingly good, although I still don't think I have fully recovered from the exertion nearly 2 weeks later.

Today I am venturing out to a bonsai show with a friend. It will be a big half day but with good sleep last night and nothing on this afternoon I hope it won't be a disaster energy / fatigue wise. I'm hoping the joy and excitement of being at the show will win the day for me.

Well I'm off to the show.

More posts to follow re:
Holiday
Insurance
Illawarra bonsai show
Health
and big decisions and changes on the way.

SB